Life and Death

I write this from my aunt's office in sunny San Diego, California. Unfortunately, my trip out here has yet to be so sunny.

Last Thursday, 7/15/2010, my grandmother passed away into the arms of our loving Savior. What mixed emotions that has stirred within me. I have been so blessed this far in my life to have never lost a loved one...until now. These are all completely new feelings of lonliness and surrender that I've never understood or expected when dealing with death. Since she has been battling with dimensia for over four years, there is complete relief in knowing that she is no longer battling...no longer struggling...no longer hurting. And my grandpa no longer needs to worry about her...to take care of her...to be burdened by her constant pain and struggle for life. But of course, with that relief comes that pain and sadness that she is gone from us. And there is such a presence missing in our family now that can never be replaced.

A memorial service for my dear FarMor (our family name for my grandma; our grandpa we call FarFar) will be held in just two days, and on Sunday, our immediate family will charter a boat to scatter her ashes at sea. Oh, how she will be missed, but how grateful I am that our family gets to bid her farewell together, arm-in-arm, crying and rejoicing at the same time. She is whole and complete now. She is in no pain. Praise the Lord for his saving grace, and for the fact that we will see her again someday!